Life Together Can Be Sticky
Philippians 4:1-8
I don’t know if you’ve noticed this but life together can sometimes be sticky. Parents have problems with their children, children have problems with their parents; we have problems with siblings, with relatives, with co-workers and so on. The problem is that we don’t always see things the same way, or do things the same way. I don’t know any relationship that shows this better than marriage. As often is the case in a marriage, the bride and groom come from very different families. Take this couple for example:
That’s Jeff and I as newlyweds in 1978 and we did come from two very different families! My family was the warm and fuzzy kind of close. Jeff’s family not so much! We came from two very different backgrounds. And the holiday where this showed up the most was Christmas. Christmas was my mother’s favorite time of year, so it was always special in our home. Christmas was not always the best time of year for Jeff and his family, so you can imagine that our first Christmas together was great! NOT! In fact, it was close to a disaster. But, we’re still married, so I guess we survived! That first Christmas I carried on the traditions I had in my home. I decorated a tree, bought Jeff a gift and stuffed a small stocking with some practical goodies like soap and socks. Jeff came home from work on Christmas Eve, looked at the tree, looked at the gifts, looked at me and said, “You got me a gift?” Now mind you, Jeff had bought me some very nice gifts while we were dating, so I assumed this would continue now that we were husband and wife! “I’ll be right back,” he said heading out the door.
Now, guys, last minute gift shopping is not always a good idea (unless you know exactly what the other person wants)! Those kind of gifts have a tendency to look like, well, just like you ran out to any store and pulled something off the shelf! Jeff ended up giving me a small candle that sat on a plastic base which was definitely not my taste and I didn’t know how to tell him I didn’t like it! I was miserable. But, we managed to get through that first Christmas and we’re still married so I guess we survived! Sometimes life together can be sticky!
Of course, we NEVER have any problems in getting along in the church. We all get along, don’t we? Why are you laughing? Yes, we do have problems in the church, because just like marriage, sometimes life together can be sticky.
I was listening to a phone conversation between Jeff and a friend of ours recently. Now before you think I was eaves dropping, let me tell you that Jeff likes to put the phone on speaker phone and in our small house that means I can hear the conversation too! Jeff and Ulvid were commenting on this very subject- the divisions and fragments in the church due to disagreements and the different way denominations interpret the things of faith. “It’s too bad we can’t return to the way the church was in Acts” Ulvid said. And I found myself somewhat agreeing with his lament. We all love that beautiful passage at the end of Acts Chapter 2 where Luke takes note that the believers gathered together, and made a tremendous impact in Jerusalem and beyond by sharing their resources and in the way that they got along with one another. But something wasn’t sitting right. Something in the back of my mind urged me to take a second look, so I picked up my Bible and began to read. Acts chapter 3, things are still great. Acts chapter 4, still good. Acts chapter 5, smooth sailing. Acts chapter 6, uh oh! Problems!! A problem arose with the widows who needed assistance. Some widows were being served and some were not. Do you know what the early church’s solution to this problem was? They created the office of deacons. The deacons then collected the funds and resources and distributed them evenly among those in need.
In fact the whole New Testament is full of letters written to churches that had problems! Life together, even in the early church, was sticky! BUT WAIT!! Wait, Ann! I remember one church that was OK- one church that Paul wrote to that didn’t have any problems. They loved Paul, they loved each other, and Paul loved them- it was the Philippian church- they got it right!! Well, if you were listening to the Scripture reading this morning, you know that even in Philippi, life together could get sticky.
The Philippian church is one of the few churches that we have a fairly complete history of in the Scriptures. In Acts 16, Luke records Paul’s visit there in AD 49/50. But Philippi was actually a long established city by then. Paul would have come in to Philippi on this road- the Via Egnatia.
The Via Egnatia was part of the Roman Empire’s extensive road system (very much like our interstate highways). It stretched from the east side of the Empire to the west. Philippi was established by Philip the second of Macedonia in 356 BC. And when Paul traveled there the Via Egnatia would have led him right in to the heart of the city- the Forum which was an open market, Wall Street and Town Hall all rolled in to one.
The pillars you see in the distance here, were not there when Paul came to Philippi. They’re from the 6th century but the pillar in the foreground is from Paul’s day and I can picture him leaning up against that pillar, checking out the people and looking for fellow Jews. Paul followed this evangelistic process every place he went- to the Jew first and also to the Greek (Rom. 1:16), but Philippi was a Roman colony with all the rights and privileges therein. So the Jewish population here was quite small. That meant Paul had to look for them elsewhere and that meant only one place- the river. Why the river? Because Jewish worship always involved ritual cleansing and you need fresh water for that.
Paul did find a gathering by the riverside. He preached and Lydia responded. Paul also returned to the Forum and preached there as well and a slave girl was delivered, which, in the long run, landed Paul and Silas in this-
the Philippian Jail. In spite of being flogged and beaten, Paul and Silas praise God (amazing!) and lo and behold, long story short, the jailer and his household also believe! I like how Barclay described this fledgling church. He called it “the whole gamut” society” what with a wealthy Jew, a poor slave girl and a middle-class jailer all making up the congregation.
Not only that, Philippi was also a retirement community for the military. Soldiers in the New Testament were enlisted in the Roman Army. They served for 20 years and were recruited from all parts of the Empire. They were also assigned duty away from home. The army was divided into legions. Legions consisted of 6 cohorts and each cohort was divided into 60 centuries, making a legion 36,000 men strong. Centurions oversaw each century. They were intelligent, well paid, highly motivated men who typically served well beyond the required 20 year period. When they retired to cities like Philippi, they became effective and influential leaders there. Add them into the combination of people in the church at Philippi and you realize that it was made up with just as many different kinds of people with just as many different backgrounds as any church today. And although the church at Philippi is noted for its ability to demonstrate Christian love, life in Philippi could still get sticky.
Euodia and Syntyche were members of the Philippian church and very active members from what we can see in these few passages directed to them. Apparently there disagreement is between the two of them at the moment, but Paul is concerned that it could spread. Their names add a sense of irony to the situation. Euodia means prosperous journey or fragrance. Syntyche means fortunate. But their behavior is anything but fortunate or fragrant. Euodia and Syntyche were not pew warmers. Paul says that they “contended” with him for the Gospel. This word has a powerful athletic tone to it, like a wrestler. It reminds me of a football team. Now, I am not an expert in football (nor do I want to be!), but I have learned this much about running plays. In a running play, the quarterback hands the ball off to his “runner” who will push through the opposing team’s players in order to get a certain amount of yardage. His teammates have the task of blocking the opposing team’s players who are intent on tackling the runner. If the blockers don’t block, the ball won’t move forward. If the quarterback drops the ball, the ball won’t move forward. If the runner doesn’t run, the ball won’t move forward. They each have an equal part in making the play. No one is more important than the other. Paul sees Euodia and Syntyche in this way. Their participation in his ministry was just as important as Paul’s role in it.
We don’t see this in our English translations because translators are always trying to word things as smoothly and succinctly as possible in the English, but Paul actually addresses each of them separately. I PLEAD with Euodia. I PLEAD with Syntyche. This shows that his words have urgency and importance. He does not see their disagreement as a “female” thing. He sees it as a CHURCH thing. If they can’t work out their individual problems, the whole church will suffer for it. He writes separate admonitions to them, because he sees them equally responsible to repair and reconcile their relationship. Life for Euodia and Syntyche had become sticky. But Paul believes they can overcome their differences and he encourages them to get busy and do it.
How do we work through issues when life becomes sticky? I believe this passage has some valuable tools that we can use when we are faced with disagreements within the body of Christ. I would like to highlight a few of them now.
The first tool can be found in verse 3. Paul asks someone he calls his “true comrade” (NAS), or “teammate” (NLT) to assist Euodia and Syntyche as they work through this issue. Sometimes we need someone to step in and work as a mediator. A mediator often has a clearer perspective on things because they are not emotionally invested in whatever is causing the problem. That perspective can bring two parties together when the people involved are willing to look at the issue in a new way. That person must be a “true comrade”, that is someone who also has the same goal in mind or same view of life, that is a fellow believer. That way everyone is on the same page with the same goal- to glorify Christ- in mind.
The second tool comes to us in verses 4 and 5. First Paul encourages us to rejoice. This is not something we would naturally do when things are not going well, but it makes a huge difference when we do. Paul also encourages us to be forbearing (NAS) or considerate (NLT) in spirit. Again, this is not easy to do. Our natural tendency is to complain and tell anyone and everyone about our misery! But what good does this do? Oftentimes it only makes matters worse. So, here is my paraphrase for these verses (the ALV- Ann LeFevre Version): Refuse to complain! Instead find things that give you joy and talk about them instead!
The third effective tool in dealing with sticky issues is prayer (verse 6). Not a prayer that goes like this, “Dear Lord, please make so and so see it my way!” No, we are to bring our needs to the Lord but with a willingness to let Him correct and reprove our perspective so that in the end we bring Him glory.
But I believe the greatest tool to dealing with issues that come up and become sticky is found in verse 8. The key to working through sticky issues is found in the things we set our minds on. Let’s look at some of these attributes.
We are set our minds on whatever is true. This word means “real”- whatever is consistent with both fact and reality. I might walk outside and say the sky is blue on a cloudy day. It doesn’t look blue, but the fact is that if the clouds moved away, we’d see the blue sky. That’s a fact and it’s consistent with reality.
We are to set our minds on admirable things. These are things of “good repute”; they have a good reputation. Perhaps there is a store you recommend to someone, or an auto mechanic who has earned your trust. You do not hesitate to tell others about them because you know they will live up to their reputation.
We are to set our minds on things which are excellent. These are things that have more than a monetary value. They are valuable in intangible ways as well. They are virtuous and have integrity.
And lastly we are to set our minds on things which are praise-worthy. Simply they are worth being talked about because they are just THAT good. Your favorite restaurant, an amazing athlete, a good book- things that inspire you that you know others will also benefit from if they come in contact with them.
I have long looked at this familiar passage from the vantage point of an artist. I thought these adjectives described the beauty of Greek art which the Romans perfected. The attributes of truth, purity, excellence, all these things were deified in art. But after studying these words I realized I was all wrong! These words are not about ART, they are about SOLDIERS! The attributes of Philippians 4:8 epitomized the dedicated centurions of the Roman army, and retired army personnel were a dominant part of the Philippian society, and quite possibly the Philippian church too.
The Roman army was a fine example of unity. Even though the soldiers came from all parts of the Empire, they were trained to function as one. By assigning command to a smaller amount of leaders, who in turn oversaw manageable groups of infantry, the army was able to conquer formidable foes and keep peace within the realm. Paul makes his point in a subtle way. If the army could uphold honorable and desirable attributes like these, the church should do so even more. If the Roman army could live by these standards and keep peace over a vast Empire, the church should do so even more.
How ridiculous then for Euodia and Syntyche to be arguing over some disagreement. They had served as soldiers in the cause of the Gospel, and now the “harmonious two” could not live up to the names they bore. Like their Roman counterparts, Euodia and Syntyche, as well as the rest of the Philippians, needed to set their minds on those things that were true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy. By doing so they would receive more than earthly peace, they would receive the peace of God.
But what does this mean to the people of First Presbyterian Church of Milford? What does it mean to you? To be honest with you, I don’t know what this message means to you. I know this- in May, long before Pastor Ben asked me to speak to you this morning the thought came to me, “IF I ever get asked to speak again, I think I’ll speak on Euodia and Syntyche.” I am not sure why I thought that! Who really picks disagreeing women as a sermon subject? And when Ben did ask me, I tried my best to come up with a different passage! But the Lord would not let this one go. So here I am presenting this to you this morning.
I am reminded of the words of Christ in Matthew 5:21-24 where Jesus says that if you come to the altar to worship with an offering and remember that (ALV again) your life with someone else has become sticky, you must put the offering down and repair the relationship. Why is this so important to us? Why so critical? I believe it is because of WHERE we are in this community- prominently poised on the corner of Broad Street and Ann Street. AND because of what we are here to do in this community. We are to be a light in a dark world, in a community that is in darkness. If we cannot set our minds on whatever is right, whatever is true, and so on, we will NOT make an impact here and the Gospel will not be proclaimed. All Christians contend together in the proclamation of the Gospel. It’s important not to let disagreements cause division among us. We are a team. We work together to accomplish a goal. God is saying something to you today. What are you going to do about it?
Final Thoughts:
When the tribes of Israel gathered together in Jerusalem to worship at the Temple, they didn’t always come with the best of attitudes. Sometimes life together in Jerusalem was sticky. So King David wrote to them, “Hine ma tov, uma niyim chevet achim gam yachad!” Sounds pretty cool in Hebrew, doesn’t it!? “Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brothers to dwell together in unity!” (Psalm 133:1) David goes on to say that unity is like a fragrant oil that is poured out over Aaron’s head and it trickles down his beard on to his robes and the beautiful fragrance fills the whole room!
James wrote to believers who were spread throughout the Roman Empire, “What is the source of the quarrels and conflicts among you?” (James 4:1) His answer was SELF. But there is no joy in self. There is no peace in self. There is no unity in self.
To conquer self, the mind MUST be tuned into things that are outside of self. Your mind must be set on whatever is true, honorable, right, pure, lovely, of good repute, admirable, excellent and worthy of praise. Today is the day to change the sticky-ness of your life to that sweet smelling oil of unity. Today is the day to let your mind dwell on these things.
So finally my brothers and sisters in Christ, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute; If there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let your mind dwell on these things. And may they be reflected in the way you relate to one another in Christ.
And may the grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God the Father, and the communion and fellowship of the Holy Spirit, be with us, be within us, and be among us until the Lord Jesus returns to take us all home! Amen.